My favorite undercover story

Brandon and I load up with a bunch of paraphernalia, money and beer and set out to buy some crack. In the particular part of town we are going to, it isn't hard to do. There is a half block area known only as "Crack Alley". At the time, you literally could not get within a block and stop your car without being flogged by crackheads wanting to pick some up for you.

So we go and talk to, like the leader of the pack or the crackhead's tribal chief for the area. He recruits an addict on a bicycle to service us. Quick point, if you see a crackhead on a bike, that bike is stolen and that's all there is to it. Anyway, the addict loads up, we give him some money, drive him across town, he gets the dope and brings it back for us, the deal is done and he is penitentiary bound, so we take him back to the alley and his bike. We told him that if the product was good we would be back later for a larger amount and a female (prostitute) if one was available. He agrees so we leave.

We don't really want to be with a crack whore, we are looking for another case. So we stay gone a while and return. Same addict, same alley, same bike, same deal. He gets the money from us and goes to get the dope but doesn't return. That son of a bitch ripped us off. We tried to find him afoot to confront him, play the role, threaten to beat him down and all that but never found him. So we go back to the alley to talk with the chief.

He greets us only to find that we are pissed off. His man ripped us and we were regular customers at that point. Being a good business manager, he quickly attempts to recover to maintain business. He first tries to cover for his boy. "Maybe he thought you all were the Police". We didn't miss a beat. Out of the SUV and straight to the bike that jackass was riding. "What are you doing", asked the chief. We are stealing his bike to take it down the road and sell it to get our money back.

At this point there is no question... no way we are cops and we are still pissed. So fortunately for the manager, a dope ho is walking down the alley. He actually had a look on his face like he caught a break and is aimed to please us. How funny is that? "Still looking for a female?" Yes we are. "Ok, hold on a sec". He hit her up and she was game without an ounce of hesitation. So we load her up and off we go.

The deal... She will buy and deliver to us any kind and any amount of dope we want. She gets $20 worth of the dope and we both get sex from her after the fact. Hell of a deal I thought. Our first stop drew a blank, the dealer was gone to reconcile his stash. So we go to stop #2, a gimme. No doubt she was going to score. So while she is going to get the dope I child-locked her door and talked with the surveillance team.

The plan... Get the dope from her, keep her preoccupied and drive her straight to jail, where the surveillance team will jump out of the bushes and from behind parked cars and nab her. After all, I am not going to sleep with this bitch and I don't know who she is. Good plan.

She returned with the dope, gave us ours and we are on our way. Brandon asked if she had her share of the dope and she did. He asked what we were going to get for that $20 worth. Suck, fuck, whatever you want. Brandon asked, both of us? Yeah. At the same time? That bitch said, "Hell I aint no whore". I almost fell out of the vehicle. Are you kidding me? Two guys you don't know, all the way with both, for $20 worth of dope. No, you are worse than your typical whore. Most self-respecting whores would get $40 a person.

So we drove her to the station, where officers decended down upon her like she was the only female in a bar full of drunken sailors. We took her $20 worth of dope, charged her with delivery and solicitation of prostitution, and I assume, left her dumb ass horny (Cause we are some good looking guys, lol).