Go USA

Checking out the Winter Olympics and a couple things make me say, "Huh?". When did women start playing hockey in the Olympics? I am not opposed to it, just slower with less violent hits and no fights. Isn't that why people, well guys, watch in the first place? I say if the ladies are going to play hockey learn to fight. There is a great move during the fight when one player pulls the others jersey over their head so they can't swing or defend themselves. Works great, I used it on a chick one night during a minor domestic situation (just kidding). But it would be nice to see the girls throw down and then get de-clothed. Hell, guys would watch that all day long.

And then luge came on. What the hell?? How much shit do you have to smoke to do this? Ok, I've seen it before but it's more dramatic seeing it again. Here's the idea... sit on a souped-up sled just big enough to sit on that has been waxed and polished for maximum speed (without brakes), launch yourself down a tunnel of sheer ice that turns every hundred feet or so, lay yourself flat so you can't see where you are going, reach a speed of more than 85mph and pray that you don't wreck or fall off. I'm not sure how to steer this thing, but it's very subtle. Go too high in a turn and you will likely be launched off the track and into outer space. Go too low and crash violently into the wall.

Safety equipment must be very important. Nope... wrap yourself in colored saran wrap, put on some shoes and a helmet. Let's get back to the clothing. Aerodynamic it is, safe it is not. Very tight fitting body suit. Do not take Viagra that day, too much wind drag and leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination. Some of the guys actually made me feel better about my natural endowment. So I guess if you fall off the friction and speed would basically incinerate your body. Oh, except your head, you have the helmet. Two good reasons to wear the helmet. 1) more aerodynamic, go faster. 2) they have to have some way to identify who just committed suicide on the luge track.